Submitted by Alexandra Naughton
Philadelphia - San Francisco
Most people go through life only touching on the other weird, quick sightings that appear and dissolve just as fast. Alexandra, author in San Francisco, shares some of the experiences of her life:
I had just dozed off with an unlit spliff in my hand. The spiff drops from my fingers on to the side of the bed, waking me. I hear two loud and sharp breaths just above my face. The noise is like a large animal. I open my eyes. My cat is right next to me, breathing softly and looking around the room as if she heard the noise, too. I think to myself, maybe I’m possessed. Maybe I need to be exorcised. I text my friend, I want to tell you that something ghostly just happened to me, but if I describe it I’ll get freaked out more. He writes back, Would it make you feel better if I told you I’ve had experiences too? I reply, Not really, lol, I’m home alone. I calm myself down and go to sleep.
Creepy, but not that unusual to me. Little spooky things seem to happen all the time. The instance I described above just happened last night, but I quite often find myself feeling like I am not alone, that something is watching me. I don’t know if it because I am extra sensitive, because I am and tend to pick up on people’s emotions all the time when they are trying to hide them and I often feel those emotions, like when someone else is feeling them I can’t help but feel sad or happy or excited with them. I cry for reasons I sometimes cannot explain. I pick up on feelings sometimes when I’m alone and I wonder where they come from. I think I may be what they call empathic but I hesitate to say so for sure because I don’t have that kind of authority. I can only tell you what I’ve experienced.
Sitting in Jillian’s kitchen, we’re eating and talking about boys and our glory days or whatever. I look in her living room and see the figure of a woman standing next to Jillian’s couch. She doesn’t move or say anything, she just looks at me. Jillian is facing me and doesn’t have a view of the living room without turning around. Did an old woman used to live in this apartment, I ask her. Yeah, I think before we moved in, there was an old woman living here but she died. Have you ever seen her before? I ask, because I think I just saw her.
I’m sixteen years old and laying in bed at my parents house in my old bedroom, the one where I had to move my bed several times because I kept having extremely vivid nightmares when I slept in a particular area of the room. I’m laying in bed and thinking about what I want to wear the next day at school and it’s dark in my room but I like it that way because when there is some light like when the door is left cracked I think about how that is an open invitation to the hallway ghosts to come inside my room and I think about disembodied hands gripping the door and hanging there and the light from the hallway creates shadows and I think I can see things moving around in my bedroom in the semi-darkness, but when the door is closed I can only see my window and the shapes of my furniture. Anyway, I’m laying in bed and trying to feel sleepy when I suddenly feel something in the bed with me. It feels like a body. I am too scared to move so I let it hug me. I feel sad. I am laying in bed with some form I can feel but cannot see and it wants to cuddle with me. I fall asleep with a ghost spooning me.
I am rubbing my boyfriend’s back in his studio and we’re watching a John Carpenter movie. I sense something behind me moving and I freeze. I wonder if I’m just on edge because of the movie. I continue rubbing his back and feel like something is creeping up behind me slowly. I slowly stop and turn around and scan the studio for anything moving. My boyfriend has a dog and I notice that the dog is also looking around. My boyfriend wants to know what is wrong and I tell him nothing and continue rubbing his back. Not long after I continue rubbing his back I see a flash of light swoop by me, coming from where my back is turned and trailing off as it comes closer. I get nervous for a minute and look around. I look back behind me and see a flash of something brown duck behind a wall. I feel nervous and agitated and end up sleeping facing the area I kept looking back at.
Nothing super profound has ever happened to me in terms of ghostly experiences. They are brief sightings and passing feelings and waves of emotions that ebb away within a moment. I think I may have had sex with a ghost in my sleep once, but I am not certain if that is what actually happened or if I only dreamed that a spirit came into my bed because of sexual frustration in my real life. Similarly, I have had many occurrences of sleep paralysis and the accompanying hallucinations but I do not consider these to be supernatural experiences, even when I am indeed hallucinating “spirits” in the room with me. I feel like I do have ghosts following me around, because I never feel like I am totally alone, but I don’t really mind it, despite the eerie feelings I get at times. Maybe they’re watching over me and protecting me. Maybe I should speak with a medium.
Alexandra M. Naughton
"Alexandra Naughton is a writer in Oakland, California. Her book of poems, I Will Always Be Your Whore, is due out later this year from Punk Hostage Press. Follow her on Twitter @theTsaritsa"
Alexandra M. Naughton